Offshore Weasels

"… and hence, the concept was proved. The team felt elated. The client spoke of the further plans, but no one listened. They were happy. Happy on the Proof of Concept. The happiness made them deaf. Probably."

I recently read Scott Adams' "Dilbert and the way of the Weasel" and was heavily influenced by the 'Weseldoms' described within. Perhaps, I'm turning into Dilbert. And perhaps, everyone already is.

I strongly feel that Telephonic Conferences are the best of the breed. While the other side is speaking, you have enough liberty to mute your phone, and do stuff. Recently, we collaboratively discovered ways of turning into full time 'Weasels', and taking advantages of such meetings. And here are a couple of ideas, some of which we actually implemented.

  1. Discuss all sorts of unrelated stuff (within yourselves) during such telephonic meetings. The participation level of these discussions is directly proportional to the degree of un-relatedness of the topic with your current profession. The more your discussion drifts away from your profession, the more engrossing it becomes to discuss and talk.

For example, ERP consultants can discuss on the Anatomy of the human digestive system, endocrine and exocrine glands, Krebs cycle for ATP production, Aldehydes and Ketones, SP3 and SP2 hybridization of molecules, Organic Chemistry, Projection of Lines and Solids, Trigonometry, Fourier Series, et al.

  1. Send out each other calendar invites for the year 4000 A.D and after. Discuss on the number of attendees for this scheduled meeting. Also discuss if mail clients like Outlook and Lotus Notes would exist at that time or not.

  1. Use your whiteboard for drawing caricatures. Surprisingly you can discover your latent artistic skills therein. If possible, record the MoMs in Hieroglyphic.

  1. Equip your mobile phones with good games. If the games are multiplayer, and can be played on a Bluetooth network - nothing like it. Gaming increases your concentration and reduces your response time considerably.

So the next time you're on a 'tele-con' , mute your phone and become a Weasel! :)

DISCLAIMER: The ideas/tips described above should be executed at one's own risk.

We take no responsibility if you get fired off from your office by these tantrums.

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